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Why do we all want to feel special?


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Laurie Ellen
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PostPosted: 11/18/04 - 22:43    Post subject: Why do we all want to feel special?
When I needed glasses because my eyes were really bad at 6 years old, I felt special.

Posting on this board sometimes makes me feel special.

Isabella loves the attention her art gets.

Michael has a tendency to counter every "guess what happened to me today?" question with some anecdote of his own, in a blatently "one-upping" sort of way.

I think we're not alone... I've seen it everywhere... we all want to feel special, even if it's not for something good... like needing glasses or being diagnosed with something scary... we want people to know, we want to feel that others see us as special.

Why is this??

Is it because it's intimidating to us that we're one of so many other humans on this earth? Is that why we have this need to stand out, good or bad?

Or why else?
MechEngDropout
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PostPosted: 11/18/04 - 22:46    Post subject:
Typically unless you're one of those that society deems as "perfect," you'll constantly be struggling for attention. People are social animals, as much as I hate it. There's an inherent desire to be liked and surrounded by others that we cannot fight.
gretriever
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PostPosted: 11/18/04 - 22:56    Post subject:
MechEngDropout wrote:
Typically unless you're one of those that society deems as "perfect," you'll constantly be struggling for attention. People are social animals, as much as I hate it. There's an inherent desire to be liked and surrounded by others that we cannot fight.
Yes and no. God knows I don't struggle for attention. And people who have met me know I'm very reserved, and it takes a long time for me to open (Several Riff Raffers can witness). Nothing like I am here - in person I'm usually pretty quiet.

I agree with you in we have a desire to be liked, but I think we look to be with those who accept us rather than those we can't fight.
MechEngDropout
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PostPosted: 11/18/04 - 23:02    Post subject:
gretriever wrote:
I agree with you in we have a desire to be liked, but I think we look to be with those who accept us rather than those we can't fight.


Ah, thanks for pointing out my unclear modifier. What I meant to say was the desire cannot be fought.

I too am typically very reserved. I don't generally mix well with others, and I don't like mixing with others. But occasionally I feel drawn to other people even though I despise them.
HighHeat
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PostPosted: 11/19/04 - 00:45    Post subject: Re: Why do we all want to feel special?
Laurie Ellen wrote:


Is it because it's intimidating to us that we're one of so many other humans on this earth? Is that why we have this need to stand out, good or bad?

Or why else?


I think that's a big part of it. If we internalized that we were just another nameless face that wasn't any different than the billions who have come before us, then why bother with it all?

I think part of the desire comes from what MED said, that we are social animals. If we don't stand out in some way, we don't get a mate. If we don't get a mate, we don't procreate. If we don't procreate, "we" die.

It's a survival thing.

Those who are able to portray themselves as "more special" are likely to get the best options for survival...


You seem kinda philosophical in your last couple posts. Everything OK?
Gogirlgo
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PostPosted: 11/22/04 - 12:05    Post subject:
I think it's more that we want to know we matter, although sometimes that manifests differently, depending on our personalities.
youngrunner
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PostPosted: 01/16/05 - 17:33    Post subject:
perhaps it's to let people know that youre there-
to be honest, I dress the way i do, and behave as i do so
people know i'm there- and so i'm never considered a prep, one of those people who dress and act the same.....

and also, nothing feels better than having confidence.....standing out in a good way makes you feel special
runaroundsue
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PostPosted: 01/16/05 - 23:37    Post subject:
dunno some days I'm so reserved that I want to crawl under my rock and just peek out to observe what's going on and other days I'm on top of my rock shouting "I'm on top of the world" and it feels good to be Leo Di Caprio for a moment and then I go back under my rock
bburgoyne26
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PostPosted: 01/17/05 - 16:09    Post subject:
"I am fun to be with. Because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and doggone it, people like me.

jtski908
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PostPosted: 01/19/05 - 14:26    Post subject:
Trite as this sounds, I think everyone in their own way IS special. Some are special in glowingly bright ways, whereas others are special in ways that most others would not even recognize, sut still special just the same. I think it is sad that some of the most special people in the world do not see themselves that way. I always try and encourage others to feel special, it's nice to see them be happy and smiley.
Kel
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PostPosted: 01/19/05 - 16:57    Post subject:
Because some aspect of our life (or lives) leaves us feeling lonely, underappreciated and just generally overlooked.
JACKED UP
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PostPosted: 01/19/05 - 21:07    Post subject:
Orange Bubble wrote:
Because some aspect of our life (or lives) leaves us feeling lonely, underappreciated and just generally overlooked.


I agree with this 100%
MechEngDropout
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PostPosted: 01/19/05 - 23:31    Post subject:
JACKED UP made a post in on-topic? Geez, someone is trying to feel special.


Seriously... she's never made a post here before (I don't think...).
Milkman37
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PostPosted: 02/23/13 - 19:45    Post subject:
This topic is ancient i know but it seems to be relevant to understanding religion.Our need to be social and special has led to the creation of religion in every culture on our planet.Billions of people would rather believe in a delusional god than face the reality that we are alone on a chunk of rock spinning around the sun.That after we die we rot,and after a short while we are forgotten.This reality is too scary and we must believe in a fantasy that grants eternal life and meaning to our lives.Our culture of special ...
kushy
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PostPosted: 04/20/13 - 12:50    Post subject:
To be different from others.
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