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RexRacer
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Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 814
Location: A pancake house of ineffable crappiness
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 Posted: 10/27/04 - 12:18 Post subject:
Just yesterday I went into our 8 year olds backpack to get her lunchbox.
Turns out she had a mobile crystal meth lab in there!!!! 
No,no. Seriously though, she had taken this dollar store manicure set I had bought her to school. She just thought it was cool, not realizing that it had enough pointy, weapon-like things in there to get her suspended!!!
We spoke to her about sneaking stuff to school without asking our permission. I felt kind of weird about it, even though I wasn't on an official search when I stumbled across it, but I'm happy I saved her and us the hassle of dealing with her school suspension.
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Gogirlgo
Member
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Joined: 25 Jul 2002
Posts: 4777
Location: No deal, stalker.
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 12:25 Post subject:
| RexRacer wrote: |
Turns out she had a mobile crystal meth lab in there!!!!
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Yo narc
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Ms. Jenn
Fresh, Hot & Wild
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Joined: 14 Feb 2004
Posts: 7935
Location: Suite 550
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 12:44 Post subject:
| coachmarkos wrote: | You know what?
It's your house, it's your kid, it's your rules.
You have to decide what to do.
I'm glad I don't have to worry about this yet. |
I've decided it's my house and I can go anywhere in it I choose.
Of course, I will probably retain her privacy to the point until she gives me a reason to not trust her.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
Posts: 18788
Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 12:56 Post subject:
I grew up with parents who went through my stuff religiously. I never gave them any reason to, either. I got good grades, never once missed curfew, never snuck out of the house. Tried really hard to live by their rules--but they still searched my room. It made me feel like I could never live up to their standards--no matter how hard I tried, I felt like they didn't trust me. I know it came from my brother being an alcoholic and a screw up that they were scared I'd turn out the same way.
That being said, if I am worried about something--because a mom has a sixth sense for a reason, I will go in and look. (I still do weekly trash runs into his room) So, I think you did the right thing, RR.
It's always better to do something like that and apologize than to have something horrible happen to your son or someone else because you were scared of hurting your child's feelings. (With good cause, of course--not just because you want to search, like my parents did)
You did good, and I am glad you did it. I would have done the same thing in your shoes.
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rolling rock
The Pinball
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Joined: 15 May 2002
Posts: 16218
Location: unknown zone
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 13:04 Post subject:
| airehead wrote: |
You did good, and I am glad you did it. I would have done the same thing in your shoes. |
thanks aire.
i'm wondering how much our own childhood comes in here. my mom always told me she'd never ever go into my stuff without my permission. she told me this all the time, my room was my room. i totally felt that she respected me, in some small way, as a kid in jr. high and high school that respect went a long way. it had me feeling i couldn't possibly betray that trust -- it was a two-way street. i want my son to feel that his privacy is important to me. his own life has a place in this house too...but then there's that fine line between stepping back and running interferance for his own good.
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kattzoo
Member
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Joined: 28 Feb 2003
Posts: 3813
Location: Happily at the back of the pack
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 13:29 Post subject:
For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing. You had reason to be concerned for your son's welfare and your suspicions were justified. Kids don't have a right to privacy in your home. They may need it, you may give it to them, but in the long run, you have to do what's right for them, not what makes them happy. And in your case, your son seemed relieved to talk about it. Perfect ending.
Of course, I don't have kids so it makes it that much easier to offer my opinion.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
Posts: 18788
Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 13:33 Post subject:
| kattzoo wrote: | For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing. You had reason to be concerned for your son's welfare and your suspicions were justified. Kids don't have a right to privacy in your home. They may need it, you may give it to them, but in the long run, you have to do what's right for them, not what makes them happy. And in your case, your son seemed relieved to talk about it. Perfect ending.
Of course, I don't have kids so it makes it that much easier to offer my opinion. |
Snooping on your furry kids is quite different--yet can be equally unpleasant..... 
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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 21238
Location: www.johnnydu.com
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 13:46 Post subject:
If I have reason to believe something is being kept or hidden from me, I'll look. If not, no I respect their privacy. I have looked through my soon to be 16 yr. olds room and found stuff I don't approve of. I trust my 13 yr. old much more and have not searched his room for anything more than dishes. 
We had an incident last week where I found our bedroom had been searched. It was my oldest looking for money!  He even went through my underwear drawer???? WTF???  I backed his ass against the wall rather quickly and let him know in no uncertain terms, would that ever happen again! He's lucky that's all he got too. 
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purple hayes
Frightened Inmate #2
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 14462
Location: ON YOUR LEFT!
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Posted: 10/27/04 - 14:00 Post subject:
I see the ACLU in your future. You've violated that boy's civil liberties!
/tongue-in-cheek
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