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blue
your favorite weapon
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Joined: 21 May 2002
Posts: 7010
Location: armed and ambitious
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:15 Post subject: help blue with his homework (10 minutes only)
here's the deal - it's business communications class and i'm writing a "disinvitation".
my letter is solid but i need to get rid of "embarassed" in a line i use. but it's a bit of clinching line so i need a word that doesn't make me look so bad. (even though embarassed is what the guy says in the book)
it's due at 1.
help me find the word - here's the letter:
Dear Mr. Olafson:
Thank you for requesting one of the few spots we had available to attend our Paris Escalade unveiling. As a top automotive journalist, your coverage is always appreciated.
As you know GM promised a sneak peek at Cadillac’s first major vehicle in nearly 10 years. The 5-day trip we invited you on was to provide you with a first hand account of the Escalade for your reporting needs. However, recent worker events have caused GM to revise this promotion, and we will no longer be sending journalists to the Paris show. We are quite embarrassed by this situation, but it is the prudent decision for GM to make.
We are pleased to extend you an invitation to our January gala unveiling and champagne reception at the annual auto show. There you will be briefed on our new vision for Cadillac as a global luxury car manufacturer. And of course, we will introduce you to our brand new concept: the eye-popping Escalade.
We are pleased to have you apart of this launch, and look forward to seeing you in January. Thank you again for your interest.
Sincerely,
J. Christopher Preuss
Spokesperson, Cadillac
Note - this is not an actual Cadillac person, it's a ficitional event from a text book. Please don't sue me.
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blue
your favorite weapon
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Joined: 21 May 2002
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Location: armed and ambitious
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:19 Post subject:
a little more background: the "worker events" is a prolonged strike, and Cadillac can't afford to foot the 20,000 bill to send these reporters on a trip to paris.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
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Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:30 Post subject:
disconcerted?
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blue
your favorite weapon
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Joined: 21 May 2002
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Location: armed and ambitious
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:33 Post subject:
| airehead wrote: | | disconcerted? |
i'm currently working with "red in the face"... but that may be a bit unprofessional...
i think disconcerted is too strong to. it's like i need to say something i feel bad about something but i can't actually say i feel bad about it. (gee, i feel like i'm running for office).
hrm... fudgicles.
i think the whole sentence needs to be reworked.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
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Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:36 Post subject:
Taken aback?
Nonplussed?
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
Posts: 18788
Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:37 Post subject:
concerned?
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blue
your favorite weapon
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Joined: 21 May 2002
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Location: armed and ambitious
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:39 Post subject:
lol no no.
we're basically being empathetic with the guy we're rejecting.
more like "gee ted i feel bad" vs "this is a travesty and the world will end tomorrow".
hrm...
i might just run with embarassed if all else fails. everything else is good, i'll say i couldn't come up with anything better.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
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Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:45 Post subject:
| blue wrote: | lol no no.
we're basically being empathetic with the guy we're rejecting.
more like "gee ted i feel bad" vs "this is a travesty and the world will end tomorrow".
hrm...
i might just run with embarassed if all else fails. everything else is good, i'll say i couldn't come up with anything better. |
Oh, I didn't understand which situation you were embarrassed about. Now it makes more sense.
(I thought you were embarrassed about the strike)
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HYPERASHEL
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Joined: 18 Nov 2003
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Location: The South's Sauna, Atlanta
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:46 Post subject:
We are quite RELUCTANT in this decision but it is prudent for the GM considering the circumstances.
???????????? hows that sound?
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blue
your favorite weapon
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Joined: 21 May 2002
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 14:49 Post subject:
| HYPERASHEL wrote: | We are quite RELUCTANT in this decision.
???????????? hows that sound? |
i'm very UN-reluctant to not send this guy to paris
on that note - i'm off to class!
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kristin31
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Joined: 15 May 2002
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Location: Caught in the crossfire of childhood and stardom
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 22:58 Post subject:
chagrined? (sp?)
Connotes slight embarrassment, apologetic tone, more subtle....
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Sandy Cheeks
Member
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Joined: 14 May 2002
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Posted: 12/15/03 - 23:36 Post subject:
"We deeply regret this situation."
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Erstwhile Lurker
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Posted: 12/16/03 - 00:39 Post subject:
"As you're aware, job actions can and do affect the economics of a wide spectrum of business activities. It is against this backdrop that we regret we must suspend the tradition of sending journalists to the Paris show this year."
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blue
your favorite weapon
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Joined: 21 May 2002
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Location: armed and ambitious
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Posted: 12/16/03 - 03:09 Post subject:
i don't think i'm allowed to say regret either.
 
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RangerG
Bounty Hunter
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Location: Gmail Server Number 126
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Posted: 12/16/03 - 09:32 Post subject:
We sincerely regret this situation, but it is the prudent decision for GM to make at this time.
I see no problem with the word regret.
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