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cherylpf
crazy cat lady
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Joined: 14 May 2002
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 Posted: 03/12/06 - 18:47 Post subject: goodbye peanuts
Dearest fruit of the earth that creates the bountiful Jif, reeses and oft eaten plain,
We had a good run. Its always been a love hate relationship, it started in my youth when I would puke PB&J's and the doctor said "she's allergic to peanuts" We didn't pay much attention then. but I think its official now: we're broken up for good this time  its not you, its me. Its always been me, or a pesky antibody I've formed against you. The doctors told me as a kid not to eat you, but I did anyway, who can resist your salty sweetness? A spoonful here, a tortilla full there....Of course, then I'd puke. After several years apart, our paths crossed again, as many old habits do. "I can deal with the headaches" "It doesn't make me wheeze that much" little lies I'd tell myself so our affairs could continue. But the headaches are a beeyatch and frankly I prefer breathing over a reese's peanut butter egg. So, "moderation" I said. And we've managed that well. Moderation has meant increasingly longer breaks between our meetings and less of you when we do finally meet again.
Until yesterday, when I was starving to death, held captive on a plane with no food. I ate a lot of peanuts. Several bags of roasted, some bridge mix, a reese's egg and some peanut M&Ms (it was a long flight). What do you do in return for such affection? Well, today my entire face is swollen and I feel as though I have an axe in my head. You know what, peanut? Thats it. I can't handle this type of roller coaster ride of a relationship. "Oh it tastes so good and I'm so satisfied after I eat you" "Oh, now I can't breathe and I look as though I've been beaten in the face I'm so swollen with hives" No. There is other food out there, I don't need this. And get out of my food. Start inviting your cousin "cashew" over instead, would you? Thanks. Have a nice life.
I'll always love you,
pffff :itchy face:
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Kimba90
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Joined: 03 Dec 2003
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 18:50 Post subject:
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cherylpf
crazy cat lady
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 18:55 Post subject:
This hives/facial swelling plus the oak pollen count (my super mega plus allergy) is at severe levels today. You know what would really ruin my day would be having to go to the ER for an asthma attack.  
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Joined: 16 Jul 2003
Posts: 19385
Location: A moving target in a firing range.
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:00 Post subject:
Would it be a combination of the nuts and being in the plane?
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TriBob
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Joined: 29 Aug 2002
Posts: 5771
Location: Lost in Transition
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:01 Post subject:
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cherylpf
crazy cat lady
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:07 Post subject:
| gretriever wrote: | | Would it be a combination of the nuts and being in the plane? |
Possibly, I hadn't thought of that. My theory is its a combo of the nuts and the current pollen counts as pollens are my main allergy. Its been in the 80s all week and we're in that "everything outside is neon green" phase of oak pollen. That alone can do me in, but doesn't usually cause hives. So I think its a tag team effort between the peanut fiesta and oak pollen.
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genie
Master of Prissface
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 16194
Location: Finding serenity one day at a time
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:13 Post subject:
That sucks pffff......howzabout I send you a bucket of chocolate to help ease the pain? Chocolate is nature's most perfect breakup food.
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Joined: 16 Jul 2003
Posts: 19385
Location: A moving target in a firing range.
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:14 Post subject:
| genie wrote: |
That sucks pffff......howzabout I send you a bucket of chocolate to help ease the pain? Chocolate is nature's most perfect breakup food. |
That'd be better than a frickin' pickle. Just sayin'... 
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cherylpf
crazy cat lady
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Joined: 14 May 2002
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:18 Post subject:
| genie wrote: |
That sucks pffff......howzabout I send you a bucket of chocolate to help ease the pain? Chocolate is nature's most perfect breakup food. |
Excellent!
just keep the snickers...and mr. goodbars...and reeses....and...
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rolling rock
The Pinball
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Joined: 15 May 2002
Posts: 16218
Location: unknown zone
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:53 Post subject:
jif is definitely comfort food. i'm so sorry!
having antibodies to our favorite foods just sucks ROCKS. just sayin.
 feel better. and i'm here to say YOU NEVER NEEDED THAT IDIOT ANYWAY.
dear peanut:
she's too good for you, you...you...freekin' NUT.
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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 21238
Location: www.johnnydu.com
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 19:54 Post subject:
My God PF that is terrible! Please stop now.  This can be so dangerous. 
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
Posts: 18788
Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 20:20 Post subject:
Oooh. That is TEH SUCK! 
Worst part is, none of the other "nut" butters are near as tasty.
I'm sorry.
RR is right, you're too good for him, move on. He was a total nut.
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HYPERASHEL
Member
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Joined: 18 Nov 2003
Posts: 15397
Location: The South's Sauna, Atlanta
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 20:21 Post subject:
Pffff. I'm so sorry , i can't imagine life without my chunky peanut butter. BUT......as you know now......espicially in your new carrer that you can't have it without some dire consequences (did i spell that word right?)
i wish i could help you and get rid of that headache, i know the polen headaches all too well myself.
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purple hayes
Frightened Inmate #2
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 14462
Location: ON YOUR LEFT!
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 20:44 Post subject:
Tis a solemn occasion.
<--goes off to look for his sackcloth and ashes.
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Floridaboiler
POTFH
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Joined: 18 May 2002
Posts: 11322
Location: Jacksonville, Florida
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Posted: 03/12/06 - 21:05 Post subject:
And to think I was going to say that Peanuts stopped making original cartoons a few years ago!
Sorry to hear that.
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