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msparks
Member
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Joined: 13 Nov 2003
Posts: 3182
Location: Jammin' at the Frim Fram, Frippin' in the Krotz
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 Posted: 11/22/03 - 18:06 Post subject:
I've given this (hopefully) hypothetical situation a fair amount of thought and I've done my research. (Okay, I looked in the fridge.) For the sake of the question, I'll assume that I can't open the door and throw anything to a point of safe retrieval. It's got to be what I can get back with me.
The idea of using ground meat to chum the water to distract the sharks is a good one but...why go to the trouble of getting to the fridge only to feed the sharks? Useful as a distraction, though.
I think that I've got the solution. It's time to forget about aging those bombers (22oz. bottles) of beer. I grab one Stone's Imperial Stout in one hand and one Stone's Old Guardian in the other. I overlook the smaller bottles. This is serious bidness.
After returning to safety, I open the Imperial Stout and drink it. (It provides plenty of calories.) I now have the energy and inspiration to compose a "I'm stranded on a desert island" note, being careful to include my location. (Hey, I'm not going anywhere without a GPS device.) I'm so pleased with myself that I drink the barleywine-styled ale and, before dozing off, write another note.
Upon awakening the next morning, the notes are inserted into their bottles and they're thrown into the sea. Several weeks later, it becomes apparent that this effort has proven successful. Not only is there a boat coming in to rescue me, but they've also brought an order of Buffalo-style wings.
Boy, am I ever glad that one of those notes was to my brother...and that he owns a Wings restaurant. And when we all meet there, the beer's on me....but the wings are up to you.
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