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genie
Master of Prissface
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 16194
Location: Finding serenity one day at a time
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 Posted: 02/03/03 - 13:37 Post subject: Valentines for realists
These are some of the funniest things I have read in ages....I can think of a few fitting places to send them too! 
These are entries to a competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line but least romantic second line:
>Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
>but I only slept with you, because I was pissed
>I thought that I could love no other
>Until, that is, I met your brother
>Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
>But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty
>and so is your head.
>Of loving beauty you float with grace
>If only you could hide your face
>Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
>This describes everything you are not
>I want to feel your sweet embrace
>But don't take that paper bag off of your face
>I love your smile, your face, and your eyes-
>Darn, I'm good at telling lies!
>My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
>Marrying you screwed up my life
>I see your face when I am dreaming
>That's why I always wake up screaming
>My love you take my breath away
>What have you stepped in, to smell this way?
>My feelings for you no words can tell
>Except for maybe "go to hell"
>What inspired this amorous rhyme?
>Two parts vodka, one part lime
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Cappy
Excelent
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Joined: 16 May 2002
Posts: 27368
Location: Spreadsheetylvania
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 13:39 Post subject:
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TriBob
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Joined: 29 Aug 2002
Posts: 5771
Location: Lost in Transition
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 13:39 Post subject:
You should retitle this to "How not to get a nap"
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cherylpf
crazy cat lady
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 17305
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 14:07 Post subject:
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Sandy Cheeks
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 4605
Location: in the city that never sleeps
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 14:14 Post subject: Re: Valentines for realists
| genie wrote: |
My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for maybe "go to hell"
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All of those are very funny, but this one is hysterical!
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rolling rock
The Pinball
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Joined: 15 May 2002
Posts: 16218
Location: unknown zone
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 14:21 Post subject:
nice 
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pokychick
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Joined: 02 Oct 2002
Posts: 5640
Location: City of Dis
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 14:36 Post subject:
[scroll:5bc3beb571]  [/scroll:5bc3beb571]
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genie
Master of Prissface
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 16194
Location: Finding serenity one day at a time
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 15:05 Post subject: Re: Valentines for realists
| Sandy Cheeks wrote: | | genie wrote: |
My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for maybe "go to hell"
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All of those are very funny, but this one is hysterical! |
I knew if no one else, you and Cheryl would be howling over these!!!!
What say we have a little Valentine-making party at my house.....
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akern
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Joined: 31 May 2002
Posts: 17149
Location: CTU
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Posted: 02/03/03 - 15:19 Post subject: Re: Valentines for realists
| Sandy Cheeks wrote: | | genie wrote: |
My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for maybe "go to hell"
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All of those are very funny, but this one is hysterical! |
My husband just might find this one on his valentine this year.
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purple hayes
Frightened Inmate #2
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 14462
Location: ON YOUR LEFT!
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Posted: 02/05/03 - 09:55 Post subject:
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Earlyrunnr
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Joined: 15 Nov 2002
Posts: 337
Location: Green Bay
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Posted: 02/05/03 - 10:11 Post subject:
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