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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 21238
Location: www.johnnydu.com
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 Posted: 11/19/04 - 09:54 Post subject: Teen Pregnancy
I've been distracted all week after finding out Tuesday that one of my sons best friends is going to be a Father. He is not even 16!!!!   His mother and I are close friends as well. She talked to me about it a bit this morning at the gym. She just found out Sunday about this baby which is due in late January. The girl and her son have been boyfriend/girlfriend for 4 years. The girl spends lots of time at their house. How the F does this happen???? How does nobody not know??????? This just seems so unreal. My friend wants them to put it up for adoption. The girls parents want her to keep it.
This will completely change the lives of everyone in these 2 familes. On top of it all, this is the boy you would think something like this would never happen too.
Anybody have experience in this situation? Is there blame?? If so who?? Do you buy or put your kids on birth control?? Isn't this saying it's OK???? My son is 16 and I can't even imagine him being a father. 
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MechEngDropout
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 09:56 Post subject:
They started dating at 11? That in of itself is scary.
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robp
Pyromaniac
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Location: Waiting in line at the beer store...
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:02 Post subject:
I threaten my boys with death if they were to make me a granddad before they were out of high school and self-sufficient. The Marine and I discussed the subject on a regular basis - he's had the same girlfriend for 4 years and I am not naive enough to think nothing is going on. Emphasis on the fact that one single time of not using protection can alter their life drasticly helps I think. IMO, it is the parent's responsibility to not ignore the subject and make damn sure the kids are informed. Ignoring the situation and hoping something doesn't happen just doesn't cut it.
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Location: A moving target in a firing range.
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:04 Post subject: Re: Teen Pregnancy
| JACKED UP wrote: | | Do you buy or put your kids on birth control?? Isn't this saying it's OK???? | |
To the last question, putting them on it is saying yes, tacitly or not.
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andydp
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Joined: 23 Sep 2003
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Location: Upstate NY near Albany
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:05 Post subject:
This is what heppens when hormones take over. Obviously everyone thought " these kids will never do anything like that". They did. Despite what you do, or what you think, if you don't physically keep an eye on the kids they will find new and unique ways of surprising you.
We were/are absolute pains to both our kids reguarding this. I'm hoping they got the message. I had to explain to my son that "en ceinte" doesn't just mean 9 months - it means 18 years of child support.
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purple hayes
Frightened Inmate #2
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:05 Post subject:
My oldest kid is only 15 years younger than I am.
So, no, I can't be of any help.
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Cappy
Excelent
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:16 Post subject:
Our kids are still young enough that this isn't an issue yet. Our oldest does know all the facts of life. I am not sure how we are going to handle this when the kids get older.
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andydp
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:16 Post subject:
| robp wrote: | | I threaten my boys with death if they were to make me a granddad before they were out of high school and self-sufficient. The Marine and I discussed the subject on a regular basis - he's had the same girlfriend for 4 years and I am not naive enough to think nothing is going on. Emphasis on the fact that one single time of not using protection can alter their life drasticly helps I think. IMO, it is the parent's responsibility to not ignore the subject and make damn sure the kids are informed. Ignoring the situation and hoping something doesn't happen just doesn't cut it. |
 and again
I have also told my kids 50's is too early to be a grandparent. I can wait thank you...
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Cappy
Excelent
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:18 Post subject:
| andydp wrote: |
I have also told my kids 50's is too early to be a grandparent. I can wait thank you... |
Our Mother's were in their late 40's and our Dad's early 50's
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purple hayes
Frightened Inmate #2
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:20 Post subject:
| andydp wrote: | | I have also told my kids 50's is too early to be a grandparent. I can wait thank you... |
I wouldn't be surprised at all if I were a grandfather before I hit 40.
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Cappy
Excelent
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:23 Post subject:
| purple hayes wrote: |
I wouldn't be surprised at all if I were a grandfather before I hit 40. |
Maybe then, you will finally change a diaper 
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andydp
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Location: Upstate NY near Albany
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:23 Post subject:
| Cappy wrote: |
Our Mother's were in their late 40's and our Dad's early 50's |
Cappy: That's just me OK ?
I was 32 when my oldest was born, 35 when the daughter was born. I really would appreciate a couple of years of peace and quiet before Grand kiddies.
If I know my wife we will become the "official first resort child care option" for both kids.
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Sahara
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:23 Post subject:
| robp wrote: | | I threaten my boys with death if they were to make me a granddad before they were out of high school and self-sufficient. The Marine and I discussed the subject on a regular basis - he's had the same girlfriend for 4 years and I am not naive enough to think nothing is going on. Emphasis on the fact that one single time of not using protection can alter their life drasticly helps I think. IMO, it is the parent's responsibility to not ignore the subject and make damn sure the kids are informed. Ignoring the situation and hoping something doesn't happen just doesn't cut it. |
listen and talk, talk and listen, rinse, repeat forever
I've been explicit to my older two (11 & 10) about when I think they could consider having sex. I've told them why. I've given examples of families that had young parents (both single parents and married) and explained the consequences of that.
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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Joined: 06 Jun 2003
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:35 Post subject:
He will be 16 next month and she will be 17 in Jan. before the baby is due.
Rob, it sounds like we have had similar discussions with our boyz.
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Joined: 16 Jul 2003
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Location: A moving target in a firing range.
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Posted: 11/19/04 - 10:38 Post subject:
| Cappy wrote: |
Maybe then, you will finally change a diaper |
But think about that third generation of PHers with them shirts. 
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