My thoughts on Ocean Reef

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I'll tell you them in more detail later. My first thought was that what I saw of it (which was a lot, as I got to the interview early and drove around to check things out) was that the homes looked like those of every suburb you would see in middle America but locked behind a gate. Honestly, we had a larger, nicer home in Columbus than some of these. Obviously, the landscaping is much different, but it is storm damaged and not as impressive as it could be.

The prices of the homes (which seem ludicrous to me) are apparently what makes it so exclusive. I was more impressed with the interview with the insurance company on Friday than I was with these people . They were nice, but superficial. Very superficial. There is no way in hell that I will take this job. The road to get there is dangerous. It took me an hour and fifteen minutes each way, and there was almost a wreck when some guy in a huge, huge truck passed me without signaling and no notice. Also, the salary that they are offering is an insult.

I did get to meet the president of Ocean Reef Club and half the management team. This was thrown at me unexpectedly after also being subjected to a rudimentary accounting test. What I thought would take an hour or so took three and half, not counting commute. I hate interviews like that, but I was used to them. They are willing to "create" a position for me. I am not really interested. It's too long of a drive with drunks and crazy drivers on holiday. Also, I don't think the salary would be there. I also think the hours would be more than offered. In summary, it's a larger version of what I just experienced. Spoiled rich people who want to be kissed on the ass. I don't kiss anyone on the ass unless I am sleeping with them. So there ends that.

Did I mention the people are as plastic as Pamela Anderson's body.

The job situation is bizarre here because people don't understand that they have to actually pay well to get decent people. The HR department honestly thought that they could retain a seasonal internal auditor for $15.00 an hour! WTF?

So I will add more interesting details about the place later, if you want to here them. It is pretty wild.

Puppy Love!

hmmmm, did youtake any pictures???

sorry you didn't like....

Shoudl I bother to drag Dad down there to shop? OR shoud we stick to Naples?

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Member

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Just as the appearance of our Club is of utmost importance, as is your personal appearance. You owe it to yourself, our members, your co-workers and the Club to look your best at all times by presenting a professional appearance.

Hair

Natural” haircuts, “natural” hair coloring, no extreme dyeing, bleaching, tinting or streaking. Food service areas: hair must be appropriately confined.

Women
Hair should be shaped and neatly combed; hair below shoulder length should be combed away from the face; hair ornaments should be plain or coordinating with uniform and attire and conservative in size.

Men
Hair should be shaped, tapered and neatly combed; not covering ears or collar; mustaches must be neatly groomed and well-trimmed. All other facial hair is not permitted. Associates may not grow mustaches while employed.

Fingernails

Women
Clean; up to ¼” long; nail polish in traditional sold colors (red, pink, beige, coral); no sparkle or ornaments.

Men
Clean; trimmed to the tip of finger; no polish.

Rings

Women
Conservative in size; one ring per hand, wedding set (2) on same finger

Men
Conservative in size; one ring per hand

Watch

Women and Men

Earrings

Women Only
Two per ear; lobe only; conservative in size; no longer than 2” below ear lobe; matched sets

Bracelets & Necklaces

Women only- no ankle bracelets

Other

Visible tattoos are not permitted.
Visible body piercing is not permitted.
Makeup is allowed for Women only as a natural application; see handbook for details.
Shoes should be clean; no sandals; no open toe shoes or shoes without back strap.

Well, let's see, this puts me out of the running already because of my foot issue; I can get my feet into Merrell clogs and sandals and have recently graduated to driving mocs on good days. I wore a pair of low heels yesterday and am paying for it severely today; it will not happen again.

Additionally, I am NOT removing the additional piercing (a small, but important diamond) from high on my left earloble. And if I should happen to raise my arms, my engagement rings pierced through my navel might show, and I am sure as hell not taking that out.

I don't think I'll fit well with this place at all. The entire accounting department wore uniforms.

I'm just thinking this is a really, horrible, awful idea. I would die trying to fit in. Don't get me wrong, I can schmooze and dress and hang with the best of them. I can discuss every subject from politics to opera to food and wine. However, I cannot handle pretentious people, nor can I handle kissing ass. I'm thinking that my first urge would be to show up to work in black fishnets, a plaid miniskirt, and a black cashmere sweater short enough to show off my abs, as well as hair down and fresh from the ocean look. This place would just invite me to incite a riot, or at the least a minor insurgence. In general, I would have so much fun causing trouble at a place like this that the idea is tempting, but not worth the drive for a few weeks.

Ironically, there are two turns on the main road into this place. One takes you to a trailer shack village, reminiscent of Deliverance. There is even a ramshackle trailer bar nameded "Alabama Jack's". Seriously, these things are poised so precariously on the water I find it impossible to believe that they survived our last thunderstorm, let alone Hurricane Wilma. I remember passing it in the dark when we first moved here and think that perhaps Leatherface could make an appearance. The other turn takes you to one of the most exclusive and expensive enclaves of the rich and famous and cloistered and spoiled.

I think the last straw was thinking that I might run into Kathie Lee Gifford and her husband one day while working (she has a home there). I can see no good coming of that.

I think mayne I need to move to my own planet for a while. I'm sure that your average human could deal with this.

My thoughts on Ocean Reef

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