|
|
andydp
Member
|
|
|
Joined: 23 Sep 2003
Posts: 8122
Location: Upstate NY near Albany
|
| Back to top
|
|
 Posted: 06/09/04 - 08:52 Post subject: Murphy's Laws For Law Enforcement
Since there's lots of popos here, I thought this would be appreciated. Note also the author is from PA
Murphy's Laws For Law Enforcement
The speed at which you respond to a fight call is inversely proportional to how long you've been a cop.
Tear gas works on cops too, and regardless of wind direction, will always blow back in your face.
High speed chases will always proceed from an area of light traffic to an area of extremely heavy traffic.
If you know someone who tortures animals and wets the bed, he is either a serial killer or he works for Internal Affairs.
Placing a gun back in a shoulder holster with your finger on the trigger will cause you to walk with a limp.
If you have 'cleared' all the rooms and met no resistance, you and your entry team have probably kicked in the door of the wrong house.
If a cop swings a baton in a fight, he will hit other cops more often than he will hit the bad guys he swings at.
Domestic arguments will always migrate from an area of few available weapons (living room), to an area with many available weapons (kitchen).
If you have just punched out a handcuffed prisoner for spitting at you, you are about to become a star on 'Eyewitness News'.
When a civilian sees a blue light approaching at a high rate of speed, he will always pull into the lane the cop needs to use.
If you drive your patrol car to the geometric center of the Gobi Desert, within five minutes some dumb civilian will pull along side you and ask for directions.
You can never drive slow enough to please the citizens who don't need a cop, and you can never drive fast enough to please the ones who do.
On any call, there will always be more 'bad guys' than there are good guys, and the farther away your back-up, the more there will be.
The longer you've been a cop, the shorter your flashlight and your temper gets.
Whatever you are about to do, if there is a good chance it will get you killed, you probably shouldn't do it.
You should never do a shotgun search of a dark warehouse with a cop whose nickname is "Boomer".
If a large group of drunk bikers is "holed-up" in a house, the Department will send one officer in a beat car. If there is one biker "holed-up" in a house, they will send the entire S.W.A.T. Team.
Submitted by Bill, Narberth, Pa.
|
Gang name?.....how about the "Riff Raffers MC Club".... 
Just kidding Joe.....just kidding.....(please don't slam that cell door on me Joe.... 
)
