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andydp
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Joined: 23 Sep 2003
Posts: 8122
Location: Upstate NY near Albany
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 Posted: 03/09/06 - 21:32 Post subject: Maybe he couldn't get through the bars...
No other comment...
Erection keeps burglar out of jail
A German burglar has escaped a prison sentence - because he suffers from a permanent erection.
Maurice Baumann, 32, was sentenced to a year's jail for burgling homes in the British army garrison town of Bielefeld.
But he escaped prison after entering hospital as an "emergency case" for his unrelenting priapism.
After a week's treatment, doctors admitted they were only able to get his manhood down to "half-mast".
Baumann told a court in Bielefeld: "I woke up one morning with a hard-on. I didn't think anything of it - that happens to men a lot. But mine never went down."
A medical report revealed that doctors stuck needles in his manhood for 90 minutes in an attempt to reduce its size. But five minutes later it was erect again.
They also injected medication into it but that didn't help either.
A court ruled that he could stay out of jail while his problem persisted but the chief prosecutor of Bielefeld is not happy.
Harald Krahmoeller said: "Only patients with acute medical problems can stay out of jail and I don't regard him as an acute case. I hope to have him behind bars within two weeks."
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Joined: 16 Jul 2003
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Location: A moving target in a firing range.
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 21:35 Post subject:
Aren't the showers in prisons cold water? There's their solution.
Achtung, Baby!
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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 21238
Location: www.johnnydu.com
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 21:36 Post subject:
| gretriever wrote: | Aren't the showers in prisons cold water? There's their solution.
Achtung, Baby! |
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 21:42 Post subject:
| JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | Aren't the showers in prisons cold water? There's their solution.
Achtung, Baby! |
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No laughing, Missy! Cheesy attempts to avoid doing one's time must be met with stiff consequences. 
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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 21238
Location: www.johnnydu.com
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 22:07 Post subject:
| gretriever wrote: | | JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | Aren't the showers in prisons cold water? There's their solution.
Achtung, Baby! |
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No laughing, Missy! Cheesy attempts to avoid doing one's time must be met with stiff consequences. |
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 22:14 Post subject:
| JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | | JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | Aren't the showers in prisons cold water? There's their solution.
Achtung, Baby! |
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No laughing, Missy! Cheesy attempts to avoid doing one's time must be met with stiff consequences. |
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You aren't getting the point, are you? The po-po letting this guy go made a real boner of a move.
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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 21238
Location: www.johnnydu.com
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 22:22 Post subject:
| gretriever wrote: | | JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | | JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | Aren't the showers in prisons cold water? There's their solution.
Achtung, Baby! |
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No laughing, Missy! Cheesy attempts to avoid doing one's time must be met with stiff consequences. |
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You aren't getting the point, are you? The po-po letting this guy go made a real boner of a move. |
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 22:36 Post subject:
| JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | | JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | | JACKED UP wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | Aren't the showers in prisons cold water? There's their solution.
Achtung, Baby! |
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No laughing, Missy! Cheesy attempts to avoid doing one's time must be met with stiff consequences. |
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You aren't getting the point, are you? The po-po letting this guy go made a real boner of a move. |
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You know, all this laughter on your part wouldn't stand up in a court of law.
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shelflifers
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Joined: 10 Jun 2002
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Location: Austin, TX
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 22:46 Post subject:
I believe we're witnessing the soon to be famous 'weiner clinic' by gretriever...
(oh, and sticking needles in one's manhood? SOOO '98!)
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 22:52 Post subject:
| shelflifers wrote: | I believe we're witnessing the soon to be famous 'weiner clinic' by gretriever...
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Nah, I leave that to the experts like Paul Reubens.
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shelflifers
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Posted: 03/09/06 - 22:56 Post subject:
| gretriever wrote: | | shelflifers wrote: | I believe we're witnessing the soon to be famous 'weiner clinic' by gretriever...
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Nah, I leave that to the experts like Paul Reubens. |
I sometimes wonder about the damage he may have inflicted on his friend 'Chairy'.... 
(left field peewees playhouse reference=lame)
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
Posts: 18788
Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 03/10/06 - 01:32 Post subject:
Just have his MIL call. Works EVERY time. Just sayin'.
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TimRuns
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Joined: 11 May 2003
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Location: Coquitlam, British Columbia
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Posted: 03/10/06 - 02:16 Post subject:
J'ed off too much I think... 
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Posted: 03/10/06 - 08:47 Post subject:
| shelflifers wrote: | | gretriever wrote: | | shelflifers wrote: | I believe we're witnessing the soon to be famous 'weiner clinic' by gretriever...
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Nah, I leave that to the experts like Paul Reubens. |
I sometimes wonder about the damage he may have inflicted on his friend 'Chairy'....
(left field peewees playhouse reference=lame) |
Chairy, nothing. After they did the bit with him and Cowboy Curtis having the weiner roast, I was surprised CBS didn't yank off the show then and there.
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