Help help, I need help! (UPDATED!)
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TreKay
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 Posted: 05/10/06 - 13:32 Post subject: Help help, I need help! (UPDATED!)
Long story, we had a soccer game last night. The team we were playing was 3-0 (last season 8-0-2). We lost to them 0-1 last season. Well I kinda had my calender marked for this game. Well we ended up on the losing end again last night 1-2. Anyhow the on the final goal our goalie put his hand on the ball and out of reaction my son kicked trying to clear it, well you can guess it, right to an opposing player, who basically put it in a wide open net.
Well my son was devastated!! I could see his face get really red on the field and he started crying. He played a great game the whole team did I told the boys after. Well at home he was just down and out, I tried pumping him back up and he even broke a smile here and there. Well the wifey calls me this morning and he woke up crying again, saying he blew it and didn't deserve to play soccer anymore.
Now my question is how can I resolve this? I thought he'd be fine when he woke up today. Did I put too much emphisis on this game? What can I do??
5/10/06
Well last night was much better, Trev was busy with homework (he has a book report due friday) I figured he was in a good mood when I got home from work, so I figured I wouldn't mention anything to him. Our next game is saturday. Thanks for all your responses, all great advice, now I am prepared for hopefully won't be a next time!!!!
Last edited by TreKay on 05/11/06 - 09:18; edited 2 times in total
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JACKED UP
PRESIDENT
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 13:36 Post subject:
I'm of no help but boyz crying makes me wanna cry too.  So much more then when girlz cry. 
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robp
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 13:39 Post subject:
Conjure up a few scenarios for him where other great players didn't quite make the play that was needed. Jordan didn't ALWAYS make the winning basket...
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cdnhollywood
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 13:43 Post subject:
| robp wrote: | | Conjure up a few scenarios for him where other great players didn't quite make the play that was needed. Jordan didn't ALWAYS make the winning basket... |
You could ask him to watch the last two games the Senators played against the Sabres....
A really good example was the overtime goal in the Sens/Sabres game 1. It was the exact same play as what your son experienced.
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gretriever
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 13:52 Post subject:
Sometimes you bite the dog, sometimes the dog bites you. Those. Things. Happen.
Let him know that he just reacted instinctively. It wasn't like he got the ball, gave it to the opponent, stepped to the side and say "Here - free shot."
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RangerG
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 13:53 Post subject:
Some day's you be de bug, and some day's you be de winshield.....
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rolling rock
The Pinball
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 13:57 Post subject:
being the coach's kid is added pressure. 
go with rob's point about all the best make mistakes, it's really how they learn to play better. you can talk till you're exhausted, but their own actions on the field are their best example and teacher.
you're great for being out there coach!
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airehead
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 14:02 Post subject:
Rob's right.
Also tell him you'd rather him be out there trying his hardest and making a few mistakes than just being there like a bump on a log never trying, reaching, striving.
A winning team is made up of people who are always trying. They don't always play perfectly, but they're always trying.
It's better for him to have tried and made a mistake than to not have tried at all.
Now he needs to know: you made a mistake--if that's the worst one you've made today, then you're doing awesome. At the end of the day, it's still a just a game. Also with mistakes: learn from it and move on. If you learn nothing from it or dwell on it then you've wasted an opportunity to become an even better player.
Do you have access to a farm team or another team so you can invite a sports figure to come talk to your team?
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shelflifers
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 15:40 Post subject:
aire's got some great advice and I don't think there is a one-pill cure on this, tre...it will probably take some on going and positive encouragement.
Oh, and I couldn't help but think of that scene from Parenthood as I was reading it (you know where Steve Martin's son 'kevin' drops the ball and the other team wins...)
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TreKay
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 15:55 Post subject:
| airehead wrote: | Rob's right.
Also tell him you'd rather him be out there trying his hardest and making a few mistakes than just being there like a bump on a log never trying, reaching, striving.
A winning team is made up of people who are always trying. They don't always play perfectly, but they're always trying.
It's better for him to have tried and made a mistake than to not have tried at all.
Now he needs to know: you made a mistake--if that's the worst one you've made today, then you're doing awesome. At the end of the day, it's still a just a game. Also with mistakes: learn from it and move on. If you learn nothing from it or dwell on it then you've wasted an opportunity to become an even better player.
Do you have access to a farm team or another team so you can invite a sports figure to come talk to your team? |
Everyone thanks for the great advice!!!
Shelfie I remember that!! 
Yeah and through all that happened yesterday, it got lost with him that he got all A's on his progress report!!!!!! Way to go Trev!!!!!!!
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shelflifers
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 16:01 Post subject:
| TreKay wrote: | | airehead wrote: | Rob's right.
Also tell him you'd rather him be out there trying his hardest and making a few mistakes than just being there like a bump on a log never trying, reaching, striving.
A winning team is made up of people who are always trying. They don't always play perfectly, but they're always trying.
It's better for him to have tried and made a mistake than to not have tried at all.
Now he needs to know: you made a mistake--if that's the worst one you've made today, then you're doing awesome. At the end of the day, it's still a just a game. Also with mistakes: learn from it and move on. If you learn nothing from it or dwell on it then you've wasted an opportunity to become an even better player.
Do you have access to a farm team or another team so you can invite a sports figure to come talk to your team? |
Everyone thanks for the great advice!!!
Shelfie I remember that!!
Yeah and through all that happened yesterday, it got lost with him that he got all A's on his progress report!!!!!! Way to go Trev!!!!!!! |
Go buy him a new flashlight!!! 
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TreKay
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 16:11 Post subject:
| shelflifers wrote: | | TreKay wrote: | | airehead wrote: | Rob's right.
Also tell him you'd rather him be out there trying his hardest and making a few mistakes than just being there like a bump on a log never trying, reaching, striving.
A winning team is made up of people who are always trying. They don't always play perfectly, but they're always trying.
It's better for him to have tried and made a mistake than to not have tried at all.
Now he needs to know: you made a mistake--if that's the worst one you've made today, then you're doing awesome. At the end of the day, it's still a just a game. Also with mistakes: learn from it and move on. If you learn nothing from it or dwell on it then you've wasted an opportunity to become an even better player.
Do you have access to a farm team or another team so you can invite a sports figure to come talk to your team? |
Everyone thanks for the great advice!!!
Shelfie I remember that!!
Yeah and through all that happened yesterday, it got lost with him that he got all A's on his progress report!!!!!! Way to go Trev!!!!!!! |
Go buy him a new flashlight!!! |
why the ohter one still works!!! 
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shelflifers
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 16:13 Post subject:
| TreKay wrote: | | shelflifers wrote: | | TreKay wrote: | | airehead wrote: | Rob's right.
Also tell him you'd rather him be out there trying his hardest and making a few mistakes than just being there like a bump on a log never trying, reaching, striving.
A winning team is made up of people who are always trying. They don't always play perfectly, but they're always trying.
It's better for him to have tried and made a mistake than to not have tried at all.
Now he needs to know: you made a mistake--if that's the worst one you've made today, then you're doing awesome. At the end of the day, it's still a just a game. Also with mistakes: learn from it and move on. If you learn nothing from it or dwell on it then you've wasted an opportunity to become an even better player.
Do you have access to a farm team or another team so you can invite a sports figure to come talk to your team? |
Everyone thanks for the great advice!!!
Shelfie I remember that!!
Yeah and through all that happened yesterday, it got lost with him that he got all A's on his progress report!!!!!! Way to go Trev!!!!!!! |
Go buy him a new flashlight!!! |
why the ohter one still works!!! |
Ok...I TOTALLY don't believe you!!!
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 16:15 Post subject:
| shelflifers wrote: | | TreKay wrote: | | shelflifers wrote: | | TreKay wrote: | | airehead wrote: | Rob's right.
Also tell him you'd rather him be out there trying his hardest and making a few mistakes than just being there like a bump on a log never trying, reaching, striving.
A winning team is made up of people who are always trying. They don't always play perfectly, but they're always trying.
It's better for him to have tried and made a mistake than to not have tried at all.
Now he needs to know: you made a mistake--if that's the worst one you've made today, then you're doing awesome. At the end of the day, it's still a just a game. Also with mistakes: learn from it and move on. If you learn nothing from it or dwell on it then you've wasted an opportunity to become an even better player.
Do you have access to a farm team or another team so you can invite a sports figure to come talk to your team? |
Everyone thanks for the great advice!!!
Shelfie I remember that!!
Yeah and through all that happened yesterday, it got lost with him that he got all A's on his progress report!!!!!! Way to go Trev!!!!!!! |
Go buy him a new flashlight!!! |
why the ohter one still works!!! |
Ok...I TOTALLY don't believe you!!! |
Well, Shelfie, when a flashlight's magic ends, the daddy will open the flashlight and take out the two "magic tubes" throw those out and put fresh ones in--and, the flashlight works!!
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karlene
Canadian Bacon
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Posted: 05/10/06 - 17:25 Post subject:
| robp wrote: | | Conjure up a few scenarios for him where other great players didn't quite make the play that was needed. Jordan didn't ALWAYS make the winning basket... |
I scored 10 goals as a defense player on my indoor soccer team. and 3 of them were NOT in the other net. It happens, it happens a lot! But it's ok, it was a mistake, and it happens to even the best players.
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