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genie
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 Posted: 03/27/05 - 12:14 Post subject: Faith defining moments?
Since it's Easter I thought this would be an appropriate topic for a poll-not-poll. I was gonna put it in On Topic but it's more of a poll than a debate so here goes....
As some of you know, I am returning to the Catholic church after an extremely long absence and will be making my first Holy Communion at Pentecost in mid-May (and, no I do NOT have to wear one of those little white dresses  ). I've struggled with my faith for a very long time and even after we started going back I've wrestled with "is all this real?" off and on over the last six months or so. The other night, I had the most incredible shining moment of clarity I have ever had in my life and I consider that my true faith defining moment. It became absolutely clear to me that there is indeed Something out there watching over me which has steered me away from something that has caused me a great deal of pain over the past two months. I haven't fully been able to appreciate all the good things happening in my life because of this situation, and now I've finally been able to walk away from it and let it go. Through this I've also learned a valuable lesson about forgiveness and the pain we cause ourselves holding on to resentments. The feeling of peace I have right now is something I have never in my life really felt.
I wasn't going to share this publicly because I know some people can get really uncomfortable around "religious talk" if that's not your deal, but since I'm a relative re-newbie to the faith thing, I am curious: for those of you with a strong faith, regardless of what your actual religious affiliation is, did you ever have such a moment, or moments? Are you following your faith because it's what you grew up with or did something actually speak to you on a more personal level that brought you to where you are now?
Last edited by genie on 03/27/05 - 13:22; edited 1 time in total
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Noley
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 12:30 Post subject:
I just believe that things that happen in people's lives are for a reason. Whatever the timing or circumstance, something higher than us has it set for us no matter what we've selected. We just carry out our lives making positive/negative choices.
For instance, I was born 10 weeks prematurely as an identical twin in small town Iowa. Neither of us tipped the scale past 3 pounds. I was born 2lbs. 12oz. We both stuggled in our first hours of life and the small hopital where I was born didn't have much in technology to sustain our lives. My twin died within the first 24 hours. I did not. Obviously, something out there wanted me to live and carry on for some greater purpose. I've always questioned her death, but feel that I would not be the person I am today if she had been alive.
All the choices I've made define something else to come for me. Whether it being the 5th interview I did in Florida, that landed me my first job, that introduced me to my former roomate, who introduced me to my now ex husband, who I've had three children with, that eventually gets me here in AZ...to the miscarriage I had in '94 (terrible as it was) so I could only get pregnant again to have my oldest daughter.
So, I believe that every day you live are defining moments. No matter how great or small, there's a purpose.
I don't breathe and devour The Word, but I try to live a good life as to how I should to live out my purpose right...and repent when I have done wrong.
OK. That's enough. Hope this makes sense.
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genie
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 12:36 Post subject:
Thank you so much for sharing that, Marcie. I don't think you've ever told us that before. Wow.
I agree, I don't breathe and devour The Word either, and there are certain things that I disagree with that my church teaches, but I really like what you said about living out your purpose. That's kinda how I feel too, that things happen for a reason, even the painful ones, and if we can take something away from them, it gives us the strength to handle them. And it's funny, but what you said about everything leading to something else.....that makes a lot of sense too. I admire your ability to see things that way instead of regretting some of them, I really do. I struggle with that a lot myself but seeing it the way you said it makes so much more sense.
Thank you for sharing such an intimate part of yourself with us. 
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airehead
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 12:42 Post subject:
I don't think I've had "faith defining moments" in quite the way you mean. Mine were quite the opposite. Mine were difficult things in my life that made me stop at the crossroads and decide: do I want to keep believing or do I just want to give it up. Surely all this crap going on means that God has abandoned me and I can give up believing/trusting in Him, right?
Well, it's at those points that I chose, despite my doubts, pain, anger, and fear that I would believe, no matter what. I'm not saying it was easy or that God and I didn't have "discussions" but I chose to believe---and during the good times it became easier to see God in the little things, really.
Prolly doesn't make sense, but there you have it.
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Noley
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 12:45 Post subject:
Your welcome.
You know, it's true that it's terrible to go through hardships. Terrible. Sometimes we go through them without warning, sometimes we go through them by the choices we make. I know that I've made some choices that were terrible and difficult to go through, but I've seen that I can survive what I've chosen and move on. I have to go through the hope that I'll be happy with the decisions I've made and the people around me are happy as well.
I live with compassion.
I live with empathy.
I try to live with respect for all people no matter how good or bad.
I live with the notion to make a difference in someone's life every day (I get this through my teaching children).
I'm not always at peace. It's hard to always be in a comfortable spot in life. You have to take that discomfort and make something better out of it.
Try to live in a peaceful place and find ways to be in that state if you are not in it. Try to do well on to others. Try to find your purpose and forge ahead with it while you're given time on this earth. I don't throw this down people's throats, but I try to live this as a person.
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blue
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 13:04 Post subject:
what about something that changes the way i go about my faith? ...i suppose, technically, it has made me believe more - since i found it hard to believe what i was being fed before...
i saw the movie stigmata and there's a line in it about not needing to go to a place of "brick" (meaning a big fancy building or temple or whatever) to believe in the big guy.
and that kinda did it for me... it was the push i needed to start believing my own things and not being pigeonholed into something else.
learning that it was ok to have my own beliefs has really helped me out. i don't think i've EVER said "gee i better not do that, that's against faith" - i try to do good things, and i know he's got my back when things go wrong.
i do my best to do something good in the world. but i don't think that requires 10% of my income, and all my sunday mornings.
but i'm happy with what i've got - it's better then some who got so tired of the hooplah and don't want to believe anything.
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genie
Master of Prissface
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 13:13 Post subject:
That's kinda what I meant about following your faith, i.e. whatever that is for you personally. I'm glad you chimed in, blue, because I do think that both religion and spirituality are a very individual thing. That's one reason I was hesitant to post this because I didn't think people would dig deep into themselves and post about something that personal, but I'm really grateful some of you did. It's making for some really great perspectives to ponder. I know I already learned something today.
My feeling is, whether one chooses "brick", as you say, or a quiet walk in the mountains or a seat on the beach contemplating the vastness of everything is irrelevant. IMHO, there is no right or wrong way to "do" faith, it's what works best for you. Even if that choice is not to have faith in anything Higher than yourself. I still do a lot of talking, thinking and praying on my own yet I find comfort in the rituals of my church and the acceptance of my church "family" as well. I get something out of both and that's what works for me. But I judge no one for doing it differently than I do because it really is all about where you are in your own life and what drives and inspires you to live the way you do.
This is great, gang....thanks to you all for being so open and honest here. I love reading stuff like this because it really makes me stop and think.
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phillycat
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 13:28 Post subject:
I have had a few serious faith definining moments in my life...the most significant one was where I was when I was in a coma and almost lost my life.
My faith is based upon myself and others...not some higher being that I can't understand or explain. That is just me and my faith. I believe that we as humans have a tremendous capacity to influence many things through our actions, emotions and energy.
What my faith has taught me is to believe in myself and to give to others, always.
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brie k
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 13:44 Post subject:
Well, I was raised to believe in God and to have faith. So I do. I don't know that I've had any faith defining moments, other than my pregnancies and subsequent births of my children. All of that is just evidence of God's genius. How fabulous it is that I can be His vessel to bring forth these wonderful beings.
Regarding what Marcie said, I do not believe that God intercedes nearly as much as other people think He does. For instance, I don't believe that God needed the two children I miscarried in heaven so he took them away. My God doesn't give me something only to take it away. To me, that is causing pain, and I don't think my God causes pain. I think that bad things happen, and that God gives us the grace to get through the bad things. And that's just my view, and I could be wrong.
The whole God thing though is just impossible to imagine. I mean, it's so complicated. There are so many of us. How He keeps track of us and already knows where we're going before we do and answers prayers I have to assume simultaneously, it's just mind boggling. So I don't think about these things too much, I just am grateful that that there is a God and that His Son Jesus died for my sins.
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Maddies Wench
Flailing Homosapiens
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 13:59 Post subject:
I can nay say with the best of them, but the truth of the matter lies in that it's better to live in hopes of something better after you die than to have no hope at all.
That leaves quite a bit open for interpretation which is more my style than "This is the way it is, and if you don't follow these rules you don't get any dessert after you die."
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Cappy
Excelent
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 14:08 Post subject:
I have had a few faith defining moments in my life
When I was 18, we (rtpd and I) were on an EMS call where we had a nine month infant die. I know that moment has had a profound impact on my life.
My marriage to the lovely briode, and the birth of my own children are also faith defining moments
Perhaps the most defining moment has been the last couple of years, in learning to live with the heart condition and its associated problems, a lot of which I am private about. My faith in God has grown immensely, and its through his intervention that its making my journey through life much more fulfilling
Last edited by Cappy on 03/27/05 - 14:39; edited 1 time in total
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Noley
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 14:35 Post subject:
| brie k wrote: |
Regarding what Marcie said, I do not believe that God intercedes nearly as much as other people think He does. For instance, I don't believe that God needed the two children I miscarried in heaven so he took them away. My God doesn't give me something only to take it away. To me, that is causing pain, and I don't think my God causes pain. I think that bad things happen, and that God gives us the grace to get through the bad things. And that's just my view, and I could be wrong.
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ICC with what you are saying. Our perfect, loving God doesn't cause us our pains in life. He doesn't. That's the working of the devil and all evils in this world to challenge us as human beings (my belief anyway). However, I do believe that this is the part of His plan for us. We will have to go through whatever was set before us to endure, learn and hopefully overcome.
Our loving God doesn't want us to suffer...like Cappy and his heart...or rtpd with his precious Abby...or thegman's road with Palmer...or people with everyday woes. I just think he has a plan for each and every one of us. Whether we like it or not, we have to carry out that plan. Sometimes we have answers to it, sometimes we do not.
This is very deep for me to publically profess. I always respect the opinion of others (or try to) and I do see what you are saying...and agree.
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Noley
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 14:38 Post subject:
| Maddie's Wench wrote: | I can nay say with the best of them, but the truth of the matter lies in that it's better to live in hopes of something better after you die than to have no hope at all.
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Big word in my book.
HOPE
I agree with this MW. I also base a lot of my life for hoping for the better. I hope for the better all of the time. I think I'd be lost without hope...especially now.
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genie
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 14:43 Post subject:
| nolefan85 wrote: |
Big word in my book.
HOPE
I agree with this MW. I also base a lot of my life for hoping for the better. I hope for the better all of the time. I think I'd be lost without hope...especially now. |
Hope is one of the strongest allies we can have against the adversity we face every day. Wherever your hope springs from, it can literally save your life. It did mine a very long time ago and I know now where it came from, it just took me about 20 years to recognize the source. I wouldn't be here today without it.
It just dawned on me while talking to someone privately about this, that the hardest thing for some of us, myself included, is to ask for help from anyone, much less from Something that we cannot see, hear or touch. It is the ultimate lesson in trust, something I know I myself personally have struggled with my entire life. I'm learning that every day is a renewal of that lesson and that it's not something we ever really "finish learning," that it's all part of our growth process. Life's full of lessons like that, that we learn and relearn daily. I'm very grateful for that insight, even when the process is painful. And for some of you for helping me to see that.
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blue
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Posted: 03/27/05 - 15:06 Post subject:
| Maddie's Wench wrote: | I can nay say with the best of them, but the truth of the matter lies in that it's better to live in hopes of something better after you die than to have no hope at all.
That leaves quite a bit open for interpretation which is more my style than "This is the way it is, and if you don't follow these rules you don't get any dessert after you die." |
"i've had it up to here with you and your 'rules' " (in best homer voice)
that's what it's about. Hope. and obviously, believing in something bigger then us just makes sense - i think it's easy for me, because things have gone well... but i like to think of them as gifts, and that maybe i'm a bit predisposed to doing well... some people would say that's like thinking i'm invincible.. but really - what's the point in waiting for something bad to happen? but i'm digressing..
i like the idea of all the different faiths in the world, and picking and choosing the good stuff. a couple big issues with "how can one group be right all the time?"....
have hope, have a bunch of different ideas, and believe in something - and i think you've got it made. and then try to live a good life.
if going to church does it for you - then good.
i just get turned off when people confuse ideas with rules, i don't think the idea was to ever have rules.
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