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brie k
Member
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Joined: 15 May 2002
Posts: 5661
Location: where the wild things are
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 Posted: 10/23/03 - 07:49 Post subject:
| GaRebelRunner wrote: | | My parents never went through our bedrooms as children. They did require that we keep it neat and clean and would walk in to them to ensure those standards. But as far as them going through our bedrooms to clean them, no. And to my knowledge they never went through them looking for anything else either. |
I have my dad's philosophy when it comes to "looking for stuff." If my kids are behaving like what I feel is normal for them, then fine, I won't go rummaging through drawers or anything (not looking for diaries, personal papers, etc.) but the minute that I am worried that someone is doing drugs or whatever, then it's ON. In my heart of hearts, I don't feel that privacy in my own home is a right. I'm the parent, we pay the bills, keep the roof over their heads, etc. This is my house. Anything in it is mine. I have the right to look in every nook and cranny. If your name isn't on the mortgage, then you don't have any rights.
I don't know if you have kids, Rebel, but I remember the stupid things I did growing up. I never messed with drugs, but I was drinking with my peers. I had friends who did drugs though. Look at those boys in Columbine. One of them had parts of a sawed off shotgun on his dresser. I still don't know how this happens. Wait, I do. It's because the parents didn't see the signs and didn't pay attention. Maybe something like that could slip past me. I cannot know that the same thing couldn't happen to me, but I can say that I will be seeing what is what in the kids' rooms from time to time, and if there is any reason to be suspicious or worried, I will act on it.
What I try to do with my kids at this point is just talk to them about everything. I talk about sex, drugs, guns, strangers, war, terrorism, everything, with all 3 of them, although Jake doesn't understand this stuff yet. But he will when he is older.
It's my job to keep my kids safe, that's the bottom line. If I feel that rummaging through their things is necessary to their safety, then I will do it. Anything less than that means I'm not doing my job as a parent.
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Maddies Wench
Flailing Homosapiens
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Joined: 12 Jun 2003
Posts: 6103
Location: Seeking out the poorer quarters where the ragged people go.
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Posted: 10/23/03 - 08:38 Post subject:
Ian and I have a deal.
If he cleans his room, he can keep what he wants etc.
If I have to do it, I make the decisions about what gets tossed. It was two trashbags last time and he didn't really care too much.
I imagine he will start caring once he buys stuff with his own money.
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