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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
Posts: 18788
Location: Between here and eternity...
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 Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:12 Post subject: Chuck Norris facts, revisited
Mr Aire was on one of his camera forums and they redid the Chuck Norris facts for photogs.
Not to be outdone, I think we should do some for sports.
Chose whatever sport you like.
Chuck Norris tried swimming once. Every time he got on the board to dive, the water would part.
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HighHeat
Big Daddy
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Joined: 30 May 2004
Posts: 6682
Location: Out of the frying pan, and into the fire.
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:18 Post subject:
When Chuck Norris was in Pee Wee Football, he didn't wear a helmet because his forehead was stronger.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:19 Post subject:
Chuck Norris doesn't run, the ground moves away from him in fear.
/new low. pity posting myself. 
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HighHeat
Big Daddy
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:20 Post subject:
| airehead wrote: | Chuck Norris doesn't run, the ground moves away from him in fear.
/new low. pity posting myself. |
Chuck Norris doesn't move across the surface of the earth, the earth spins under his feet...
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:22 Post subject:
| HighHeat wrote: | | airehead wrote: | Chuck Norris doesn't run, the ground moves away from him in fear.
/new low. pity posting myself. |
Chuck Norris doesn't move across the surface of the earth, the earth spins under his feet... |
Good one!
Chuck Norris invented vaulting. It became pole vaulting only to make it more fair.
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HighHeat
Big Daddy
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:25 Post subject:
In order to make polo matches fair, Chuck Norris was forced to carry the horse on HIS back...
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:26 Post subject:
| HighHeat wrote: | | In order to make polo matches fair, Chuck Norris was forced to carry the horse on HIS back... |
 Best one yet!
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robp
Pyromaniac
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Joined: 26 Jul 2002
Posts: 16242
Location: Waiting in line at the beer store...
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:28 Post subject:
Chuck Norris doesn't need hockey protective gear - when he plays goalie he catchs the puck in his teeth.... and then bites in it two and spits it back at the opponent while laughing as only Chuck Norris can.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 13:30 Post subject:
Car racing is just a bunch of cars trying to keep up with Chuck Norris running.
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HighHeat
Big Daddy
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 14:11 Post subject:
Chuck Norris once lost the Badwater Ultra by half a second...because he carried a dehydrated competitor piggy-back for the last 30 miles while walking backwards...
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j1miller
Puppy Love!
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Joined: 07 Jul 2002
Posts: 15447
Location: Lost on trail.
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 14:42 Post subject:
you guys really seem to be having a good time.
Resume.
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.jrjo
Member
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Joined: 24 Feb 2006
Posts: 900
Location: Lake Wobegon, MN
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 14:58 Post subject:
Chuck Norris threw shotput for a season. That's why the moon has craters.
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 15:00 Post subject:
Chuck Norris invented the term jogging because no one is a runner by his standards.
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.jrjo
Member
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Joined: 24 Feb 2006
Posts: 900
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 15:06 Post subject:
Chuck Norris doesn't need a racket to play tennis. He roundhouse kicks the ball into subatomic particles.
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RangerG
Bounty Hunter
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Joined: 13 Mar 2003
Posts: 7301
Location: Gmail Server Number 126
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Posted: 04/24/06 - 15:09 Post subject:
Chuck Norris does not use a bat in baseball. He round house kicks the ball out of the park.
Once an Umpire called one of Chuck's Home Runs a foul ball. The Umpire is now on display at the Mutter Museum in Philadelphia as a medical anomoly.
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