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elkid
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Joined: 18 Nov 2002
Posts: 8353
Location: hiding out in Philly
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 Posted: 06/27/03 - 15:50 Post subject: A little Friday Fubbiness
There was a tradesman, a painter called Wayne, who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often would thin down paint to make it go a wee bit further.
As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually the Baptist Church decided to do a big restoration job on the painting of one of their biggest buildings. Wayne put in a bid, and because his price was so low, he got the job.
And so he set to erecting the trestles and setting up the planks, and buying the paint and, yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with turpentine.
Well, Wayne was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, and the sky opened, the rain poured down, washing the thinned paint from all over the church and knocking Wayne clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint.
Wayne was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got on his knees and cried: "Oh, God! Forgive me! What should I do?"
And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke... "Repaint! Repaint! And thin no more!!"
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elkid
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Joined: 18 Nov 2002
Posts: 8353
Location: hiding out in Philly
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Posted: 06/27/03 - 16:09 Post subject: ANOTHER ONE!
One day, while walking to the store, I passed by a nursing home. On the front lawn were 6 old ladies laying naked on the grass. I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way to the store.
On my return trip, I passed the same Nursing Home with the same 6 old ladies laying naked on the lawn. This time my curiosity got the best of me and I went inside to talk to the manager. "Do you know there are 6 ladies laying naked on your front lawn?
"Yes," he said. "They are retired prostitutes and they're having a yard sale."
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