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akern
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Joined: 31 May 2002
Posts: 17149
Location: CTU
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 Posted: 10/01/03 - 15:54 Post subject: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
30 Things You'll Never Hear a Woman Say
>
>1. You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for
>ignoring me.
>2. The new girl in my office is a real beauty, and a stripper too, I
>invited
>
>her over for dinner on Friday.
>3. While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth down and
>missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover.
>4. Bar food again! Kick ass.
>5. I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class.
>6. That girl is wearing the same outfit as I am. Cool, I'm gonna go over
>and
>
>talk to her.
>7. Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times, then you don't have
>to mess with it anymore.
>8. I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you want'em?
>9. It's only the third quarter, you should order a couple more pitchers.
>10. Honey, come here! Watch me do a Tequila Shot off of Stephanie's bare
>ass.
>11. My mother is going to take care of the tab, so order another round for
>you and your friends.
>12. I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it
>again.
>13. Damn! I love when my pillow smells like your cigars and beer.
>14. You are so much smarter than my father.
>15. If we're not going to have sex, then you have to let me watch football.
>16. Are you sure you've had enough to drink?
>17. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
>18. You're so sexy when you're hung over.
>19. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
>20. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
>21. I'll be out painting the house.
>22. I love it when you ride your Harley, I just wish you had more time to
>ride.
>23. Honey, our new neighbor's daughter is sunbathing again, come see!
>24. No, No, I'll take the car to have the oil changed.
>25. Your mother is way better than mine.
>26. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentine's Day thing and buy yourself
>something.
>27. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire.
>28. You need your sleep ya big silly, now stop getting up for the night
>feedings.
>29. Look! My ass is fatter than yours!
>30. Let's get rid of my friends and keep all of yours.
I've actually said some of these.  Does that make me a man?
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copteacher
Adjunct
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Joined: 08 Jun 2002
Posts: 20588
Location: Teaching in the Halls of Justice
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 15:56 Post subject:
awesome
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robp
Pyromaniac
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Joined: 26 Jul 2002
Posts: 16242
Location: Waiting in line at the beer store...
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 15:57 Post subject:
Those are great!
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pokychick
Member
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Joined: 02 Oct 2002
Posts: 5640
Location: City of Dis
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 15:58 Post subject: Re: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
| akern wrote: |
I've actually said some of these. Does that make me a man? |
me too
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Cappy
Excelent
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Joined: 16 May 2002
Posts: 27368
Location: Spreadsheetylvania
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 15:59 Post subject: Re: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
| akern wrote: |
20. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
I've actually said some of these. Does that make me a man? |
This one?
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akern
Member
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Joined: 31 May 2002
Posts: 17149
Location: CTU
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:00 Post subject: Re: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
| Cappy wrote: | | akern wrote: |
20. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
I've actually said some of these. Does that make me a man? |
This one? |
Nope. Playboy.
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gretriever
Hipster Doofus
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Joined: 16 Jul 2003
Posts: 19385
Location: A moving target in a firing range.
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:00 Post subject:
"gretriever, you are so darn good-looking!"
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Noley
AZhat
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Joined: 16 Aug 2003
Posts: 10494
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:03 Post subject:
ME: "Yes, you're right and I'm wrong!"
ME: "You know, I do talk a lot. I think I will shut up for a few hours".
Last edited by Noley on 10/01/03 - 16:03; edited 1 time in total
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cherylpf
crazy cat lady
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 17305
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:03 Post subject: Re: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
Dude I'm crying. 
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MSUrunner
Member
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Joined: 26 Aug 2003
Posts: 152
Location: The land of green and white
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:15 Post subject: Re: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
| akern wrote: | | Cappy wrote: | | akern wrote: |
20. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
I've actually said some of these. Does that make me a man? |
This one? |
Nope. Playboy. |
lol, the other day my SO and I were having a conversation where he said that he did not think that he was going to resubscribe to Playboy because he never looks at them, just adds them to his collection. I said what, I read them! He said, oh, just so someone is still looking at them I'll keep getting them then. 
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Noley
AZhat
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Joined: 16 Aug 2003
Posts: 10494
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:18 Post subject:
ME:"Yes, let's spend the entire long weekend at the softball park. I just love to spend my entire time there with the guys, chew, cussing and dirt."
ME:"Great. Extra Innings! I love to stay at the ballpark even longer!"
Note: I actually did like going to the ballgames and was the scorekeeper. Long weekends could be a drag at times though. 
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airehead
Oompa Loofah
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Joined: 12 Nov 2002
Posts: 18788
Location: Between here and eternity...
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:29 Post subject: Re: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
| pokychick wrote: | | akern wrote: |
I've actually said some of these. Does that make me a man? |
me too |
me three!
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Noley
AZhat
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Joined: 16 Aug 2003
Posts: 10494
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:31 Post subject:
ME:"Oh. And I am your mother. I will wait on you hand and foot if you wish."
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Laurie Ellen
Queenie
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Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 11286
Location: The Dark Side of the Moon
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 16:35 Post subject: Re: 30 things you'll never hear a woman say.
| airehead wrote: | | pokychick wrote: | | akern wrote: |
I've actually said some of these. Does that make me a man? |
me too |
me three! |
me four!
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kattzoo
Member
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Joined: 28 Feb 2003
Posts: 3813
Location: Happily at the back of the pack
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Posted: 10/01/03 - 17:56 Post subject:
I personally don't find anything wrong with ones involving football or bar food, and I always admit I'm wrong to my dogs.
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